The Things I Require

My list isn’t too long or too complicated. It’s neither a checklist of manly characteristics like some ladies keep, nor a catalog of pre-requisites before you can date me. When the infatuation wears off, and it becomes a real relationship that takes work to maintain, these are the things that I require:

  1. When I’ve made you frustrated, mad, irritated or hurt, please tell me. When someone else has made you frustrated, mad, irritated or hurt, please tell me that too.
  2. Let me know that you still want me, from across the room, without saying a word.
  3. Tell me that you love me from time to time.
  4. I don’t need you to be perfect, happy or funny all the time, but I do need to know that you want to be with me, and that you want to be with me in five years. If you don’t, let me go now.
  5. Hold my hand when I’m sad, sick, or scared.
  6. Don’t stop telling me about your dreams or talking to me until I fall asleep. I never want to lose the intimacy of being inside your head.
  7. Let me be the only woman. I’ve been the back-up plan and the mistress and the philanderer’s wife, but never the only woman.
  8. My feelings are valid and so are yours. Don’t make me feel irrational or crazy for having them.
  9. You’re going to make me cry, and when you do I’m going to try to run away. Don’t let me.
  10. Always say goodnight to me.

Do these things for me, and I’ll try my hardest to do the same for you.


2 thoughts on “The Things I Require

  1. -KO says:

    First, it’s hard to comment on something like this and not feel like a total creep. So here it goes:

    1.) Thank you for writing this.
    2.) Having had these basics not met in my recently ended relationship I had to make the decision to end it and I still question myself from time to time. Thank you for helping remind myself that it’s okay to need certain things like consistent emotional intimacy in a relationship.
    3.) Have a wonderful day.

    • You definitely don’t seem like a creep for commenting. I’m glad you could relate to my words, and that you were strong enough to end a relationship in which your needs weren’t being met. Best of luck, and thank you!

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